My feel-goods are really tender right now, so go easy on me. It's taken exactly one year for me to determine that I'm not a nice enough to teach my kids. It takes a special person, or at least someone not as anal retentive.
I've reached the conclusion that my relationship with my children will always trump the benefits of homeschool (even as they all come flooding into my consciousness and I woefully push them back). I kept giving it "one more day", one more prayer to get myself together, but as all of the neighborhood probably knows, every day it was one reason or another that I lost my temper with a student/the love of my life.
So here's to trying and moving on to better ways. I'll be so sad to let them go for the better part of the day, but to be honest, walking into that school to get the registration paperwork brought back some sweet memories that I hope my kids will enjoy also. Hopefully when everyone is literate and such (anger management classes ;]), we'll give it another go. For now, I get a big fat F in homeschooling.
I've reached the conclusion that my relationship with my children will always trump the benefits of homeschool (even as they all come flooding into my consciousness and I woefully push them back). I kept giving it "one more day", one more prayer to get myself together, but as all of the neighborhood probably knows, every day it was one reason or another that I lost my temper with a student/the love of my life.
So here's to trying and moving on to better ways. I'll be so sad to let them go for the better part of the day, but to be honest, walking into that school to get the registration paperwork brought back some sweet memories that I hope my kids will enjoy also. Hopefully when everyone is literate and such (anger management classes ;]), we'll give it another go. For now, I get a big fat F in homeschooling.
5 comments:
Are you kidding me? An F in homeschooling.... I doubt it. Every mother goes crazy nearly every day (or at least I do). It's the law of nature.
Your kids are lucky. The year they spent with you will not be forgotten. Good work. I admire the strengh and wisdom you have :)
Don't be so hard on yourself. We shoot for ideals and just regroup when needed. You are a great, attentive mom. Everything will work out.
Are you kidding me? You get an A+ in my book for even ATTEMPTING it! Your kids are lucky to have such a great mom!! Ü
Don't beat yourself up. I think it takes someone else sometimes to teach your children. And you are so right that your relationship with your children is the important one.
You are braver than me. Here's an A for the attempt.
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